Letters of recommendation, especially from your junior year teachers, are a key component of college applications. Colleges recognize that your teachers spend significant amounts of time with you and therefore, trust your teachers to provide a candid picture of who you are as a person and student. To receive a glowing recommendation letter, it is extremely important to cultivate a strong professional relationship with your teachers. Along with your college apps, cultivating a strong relationship with your teacher will only improve your education.
Now that we have established why it is important to cultivate relationships with your teachers, the question is how do we go about doing so? Well, there are 4 important parts, or steps, to form this relationship.
Part 1: Make a good impression.
- Creating a good impression of yourself on your teacher starts from the very first day of school. First impressions often dictate the rest of your relationship with your teacher. Present yourself as a good student by doing the following things (and continue doing so throughout the school year):
- Greet your teacher with a smile. Even though this gesture may seem very small, it makes a big difference and can immediately give your teacher a positive impression of you.
- Dress appropriately for class. Take care in your appearance when you attend class and make sure that you observe good hygiene. Your teachers will appreciate that you are ready to learn.
- Consistently arrive to class on time. Make sure to have all your class materials to show your teacher you are prepared and eager to learn.
- Don’t argue with your teacher. It is okay to respectfully disagree with your teacher but do not rudely argue with your teacher.
- Follow instructions. Show your teacher that you stay out of trouble by following instructions.
- Don’t talk to your friends in class. Most teachers greatly dislike it when students are talking to their friends/peers while the teacher is in the middle of teaching a lesson. If you talk to your friends, it shows that you do not care about your teacher, the subject they are teaching, or learning.
- Do not use your phone in class. Many schools do not allow students to use their phones in class, so using your phone in a class would immediately show your teacher that you do not care whatsoever about what the teacher is teaching. Only use your phone when your teacher allows you to do so.
Part 2: Participate in class and maintain your grades.
- Pay attention in class. It is likely that your teacher spends quite a bit of time preparing for each lesson. Respect their commitment to the class and commit to the class as well. Make sure you are not talking with friends, falling asleep, or getting distracted by your phone or anything else.
- Turn in your homework on time. Teachers appreciate students that are reliable and dependable workers. Your teacher does not need you to constantly flood them with compliments, but they do need you to submit your work on time.
- Participate in class discussions. Raise your hand when your teacher asks a question and respond with insightful answers to show your teacher that not only do you care about the class and are paying attention, but also that you have smart opinions and thoughts. Teachers care about what you think too!
- Ask for help when you need it. Approach your teacher outside of class for help. Teachers love being answer questions and help you in any ways that they can — that’s what they are there for. So, ask for help and show your teacher that you are fully committed to your learning. Asking questions also shows your genuine interest in the subject.
Part 3: Model good behavior.
- Approach your teacher with honesty, kindness, and respect. Remember: your teacher is human and has feelings too. If you see that your teacher is down or upset, check in with them, ask them how their day is going. Teachers will mostly likely appreciate your genuine concern and will be inclined to open up. Make sure to maintain professional boundaries, though: don’t hug your teacher or buy them anything.
- Be friendly and open-minded to your peers. Your teachers will love to see you naturally including your peers in a discussion or asking what your peers’ thoughts are on a particular topic.
- Be a role model. If you demonstrate how to be a good student and a good person to your classmates, your teacher will develop further trust and respect for you. Work every day to model good behavior — such as kindness, respect, and politeness — to your peers. You never know: your positive demeanor could influence your peers and teacher too!
Part 4: Build a rapport and go above and beyond.
- Thank your teacher whenever they help you. If your teacher helps you, whether that be through answering a question or meeting with you to help you with an assignment, thank them for their time and assistance. A simple thank you can go a long way in building a relationship with your teacher.
- Give your teacher an appropriate gift once in the school year. On a holiday, such as Christmas or another holiday you know they like (one of my teachers loved Halloween!), the last day of school, or Teacher Appreciation Day, give your teacher a nice gift that they’ll enjoy. The more personalized your gift is (within appropriate boundaries), the more your teacher will appreciate the thought and gesture you put into getting the gift.
- Visit your teacher during office hours or tutorial. Many teachers hold open office hours that you can use to visit them to discuss your course work, extra credit opportunities, or to talk more about a subject that you find interesting. Use their office hours to drop in and say hello, they’ll appreciate that you took the time to see them and further your learning. Dropping in during office hours is also a great way to get to know your teacher on a more personal level (while also maintaining boundaries).
- Ask your teacher if they’ll write you a letter of recommendation. Asking your teacher for a recommendation letter when applying to college, a summer program, or advanced courses will show your teacher that you respect them and value their opinion of you. Additionally, writing your recommendation letter will make your teacher pause and reflect on what makes them like you, which can make them like you ever more!
Remember: following these steps is not a one time ticket to cultivating a strong relationship with your teacher. To really form that strong relationship, these steps have to be done over and over again. Do not shy away from approaching your teacher! Chances are your teachers are smart, kind people that would love to form a professional relationship with you at least as much as you want to form one with them.